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It's
A Dog's Life
By
Trixie
Hi
- Trixie here. Georgia's gone to work so I figure, "Hey…why
shouldn’t I be able to use the computer when she’s
not here, am I right?” I mean the way she hogs
it, you would think she owned this joint. Speaking of
joints, excuse me a minute… “Darn flea!
Death to you!”
Okay…I’m
back. Did I tell you I love to write? No? Well I do.
As a matter of fact, all the articles on her homepage
are written by…you guessed it…none other
than Moi. Course she claims she did it all. Isn’t
that soooo like her? Well anyhoo, I hope you liked them
and if you get the chance, drop her a line and say how
much you love TRIXIE’s articles. That should give
her a start, heh? She deserves it too. I mean, it’s
not easy living with her. You should see her when she
is practicing one of her speeches in front of the mirror.
It goes something like this… “Welcome!
Bla…bla…bla…and my idea of a balance
diet is a cookie in each hand…Yeah, like she’s
ever been on a balanced diet. HA! It’s more like
a Taco in each hand. “…And my costume was
made by Enchanting Masquerade…” uh
huh…and your hips by Nabisco, specifically a bag
of Oreo’s while watching “Gone with the
Wind” for the zillionth time. I mean come on people,
Rhett ain’t coming back!
You
know, I can live with her bad hair in the morning (a
story in itself) and the fuzzy house shoes, and I can
even overlook her dragon breathe when she leans over
and gives me my morning hug, but would someone please
tell me why I have to wait until she has her coffee
before I get to go outside. I mean sheeeee doesn’t
wait, so why should I? And another thing, what’s
up with all that stuff she puts on her face? Everyday
it’s the same thing, over the face, under the
eyes, brush this on, brush that on. Then her majesty
will turn around to me, look down and ask in that annoying
baby voice she uses, “whatcha think Trix, does
Mamma look beautiful now?” Every day…same
thing. Well, I’m here to tell ya, in the first
place, you ain’t my Mamma, and in the second place,
somebody done lied to you girlfriend! Even with all
that junk on you will still scare small children.
I
will have to say though that all in all, living with
a delusional, but somewhat happy person isn’t
all that bad. On occasion, I have even found myself
rather enjoying it. Course those are the days when the
VCR is on the brink sooo…no “Gone With The
Wind.” Usually, on those days me and the Queen
just snuggle up on the couch and she grabs a good book
to read and of course, her Oreo’s, while I, being
the forgiving type dog that I am, I allow her to scratch
my back and rub my belly. Hey…it’s a give
and take world. I do what I can.
Uh
oh…I just spotted the mailman and jumping jehosaphat,
this is my lucky day! He’s actually coming to
the door with some kind of package! Sorry…gotta
run…if I can just lay here below this window and
lunge at just the right moment…hehehe…that’s
one postman who will be changing clothes…Man,
I love this dog thing!
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